Some Days.

Blogger's Note: As I wrote this, I felt guilty about not dwelling more on God, his goodness, or his redemptive grace, because I know that he is constantly weaving everything together--the good and the bad; he is writing our stories, and every detail is included for a reason. He never gives us more than we can handle. If you've been a Christian for any amount of time, you know all the Sunday school answers, but let's face it: some days, they don't feel real. 

This is about those days. 

I live in the trenches of motherhood. I have the privilege to parent two wonderful, rambunctious boys--two years old and younger. They are two of the biggest blessings in my life, but in the midst of life, sometimes each day can feel like a full-on battle. No--a full-on war. One I'm not sure I'm winning.

Some days, if I pause for even a moment, the weightiness of life threatens to flatten me.

Their constant neediness.
My selfishness.
Their endless demands.
My exhaustion, which extends to a seemingly cellular level.
The endless crying, whining, yelling--not all of it from the boys...
The guilt about yelling.
The dissatisfaction with my life.
The guilt about that dissatisfaction.
The nagging feeling of ineffectualness.
The mind-numbing repetition--"yes, that IS a red block."
The overwhelming responsibility to shape these tiny terrorists into respectful, independent adults.
Discipline--always discipline.

The striving for patience amidst messes that seem to make themselves, housework left undone, and goals and good intentioned abandoned.

The living in survival mode, but missing the sense of fulfillment that comes with thriving.

Some days, I wake up bone-tired to two screaming little boys, a messy kitchen, and a bad attitude. Some days, as hard as I try, things don't get better. How's that for soul-baring honesty? Because that's the truth. Some days, all I want to do is lie on the couch and ignore the world--but I can't. Because I have two tiny terrorists running loose in my house.

Even David, the man after God's own heart, the anointed one, spent a great deal of time waiting for things to get better. Praying they would. Doubting God's promises, but clinging to them all the same. I'm learning that it's okay--if in that 24-hour window, or that week, or that month, or even that year--things don't get better.

Because then some days, they do. And that gives me hope--even in the trenches.

Life In Fast Forward

Hello, blogosphere. I am a pitiful excuse for a blogger. Life has been a crazy, non-stop ride, and this sadly outdated chronicle of our life fell by the wayside as I tried to hold onto my sanity for dear life. I'll try for a twitter-sized update, but how to sum up the past year and a half in 140 characters or less?

New pregnancy. New house. New BABY. Little Mister turned 2! Lots of growing, changing, exploring, potty-training. 5th anniversary coming up! (BAM! 140 characters EXACTLY.)

Good grief. When you put it like that, no wonder I haven't had time for blogging!

Homeowners!

Overdue and huge!

Welcome to the family, Baby Z!

Little Mister is growing up!

Family fun!

Pumpkin patchin'!

Monkeying around.

My blue-bonnet boy, cheesy as always.

Peek-a-boo, Baby Z!

These pictures are just a quick overview, some of the highlights, the past 18 months in fast-forward.  Little people change so fast; I blink, and they've grown. Hopefully it won't be another year and half before I check back in. At least one can hope...

Little Mister Grows Up

Today, Little Mister climbed inside the dishwasher. Fortunately, I hadn't loaded any knives yet.

Yesterday, I was moving the dining room furniture around in order to mop the floor (which is something we tell Little Mister not to do--move the furniture, that is). From his perch in the pack-n-play, he waved his little hand in my direction and declared, "No no!!"

He now says "Bye-bye!"; "Hi!"; "Mama;" "Dada;" "Nana;" "Papa;" "Uh-oh!"; "No no!"; "ball;" "book;" "dan doo" (thank you); "kna kna" (knock knock); "dight" (light); "hot;" and "butt" (much to Grandma's horror). There might be others, but those are the ones I can think of.

Last week, he had his first hair cut.

Tomorrow, he'll turn one year old. Where has this past year gone?

He's growing up right before my eyes...faster than would even seem possible.

DIY Yarn-Wrapped Wreath

Now that Little Mister is (gasp) actually taking a nap each day (ranging from 30 minutes to 2+ hours), I'm trying to redeem my "me time" by climbing back on the crafting wagon.

Before baby, I was very into paper-crafts (card-making, scrap-booking, and the like) and sewing/quilting. For my first big post-baby project, I decided to branch out and try one of those amazing yarn-wrapped wreaths that have popped up all over Pinterest. With fall right around the corner, it was the perfect craft for me to tackle--I got to use fun fall colors, and once I

finished, I had something fun and uniquely personal to hang on my front door.

Sorry folks; no tutorial here. There are too many wonderful tutorials already out there for me

to try to replicate what I did. For the one I relied on most, click here. I used less than one "super size" skein of yarn, and a handful of felt in various colors. A little hot glue and a whole lot of patience later, I'm pretty happy with the result. It'll look even better once it cools off enough to repaint my front door "Deep Sea Dive" by Sherwin Williams.

Pinterest, it's what's for dinner!

Ok, so my obsession with Pinterest has lead to a wide variety of recipe sampling...and every dish has been met with much approval from Mr. M.

Below are two of the recipes we WILL be having again. And again. ...And again. (And I can't take credit for the photos. They are shamelessly copied from the original posters.)

Baked Zucchini Fries

Serves 2.

In a small bowl, beat one egg and season with salt and pepper. In a ziplock bag, place 1/3-1/2 cup breadcrumbs and garlic powder (I used garlic & herb breadcrumbs and omitted the garlic powder); shake well. Spray a cookie sheet with cooking spray and set aside.

Cut two medium zucchinis into sticks. Dip the zucchini sticks into the egg and then place into the bread crumb mixture, a few at a time and shake to coat. Place the breaded zucchini in a single layer and spray more cooking spray on top. Bake at 400 degrees for 20 – 25 minutes, or until golden brown. Serve with some marinara sauce for dipping.

I served these with Italian chicken sliders. I bought the Italian-marinated chicken from HEB, grilled it in a skillet, and then sliced it up and served it on whole-wheat slider buns. Would be good with fresh basil and tomato, but I didn't have basil on hand.

Garlic-Rubbed Grilled Cheese with Bacon & Tomatoes

(I modified the recipe by cutting the amounts of everything in half, and subbing cheeses for what I had on hand. For original cheeses, follow link above. Ok, read on.)

Cook 3 slices of thick-cut bacon in microwave, as directed on package.

Pour a couple handfuls (real exact, right?) of grated Italian cheese blend and grated cheddar cheese into a bowl; mix with 1/4 tsp red pepper flakes.

Slice 4 slices of thick Italian bread. Lay them out on your work surface. Choose 2 and divide half of the cheese between them. Add a slice and a half of bacon on each. Stack a couple slices of raw tomato on top of that, then add the rest of the cheese mixture. Lightly butter one side of the remaining two slices of bread, and put them on top of the sandwiches, butter side up (obviously).

Heat a skillet over medium heat. Place sandwiches butter side down in the pan and cook on the first side until the bread is golden brown and toasted. Meanwhile, butter the top slice of bread on each sandwich. Flip sandwiches and continue to cook on the other side. Remove from skillet and immediately rub both sides with the cut side of a peeled garlic clove, to give it a subtle garlic flavor. Serve immediately. :)

Makes 2 sandwiches.

I served these with sea salt and cracked black pepper potato chips and iced tea. Excellent.

Helmet Head: One Month Later

Here's a quick update on Little Mister's head situation.

His cranial vault (the difference between the rounded and the flat spots) was initially at 14 mm, which is a moderate difference. The powers that be predicted it would take between 3 and 5 months to correct it, so at his one week check-up, the helmet specialist was amazed to find that his cranial vault had already decreased from 14 to 11 mm.

We had our first 3 week checkup yesterday afternoon. (We're supposed to go in at 3 week intervals from now on.) The helmet specialist took the measurements three times to make sure that he wasn't being overly optimistic, and it turned out he wasn't. Little Mister's cranial vault decreased even more--from 11 to between 5 and 6 mm. We were blown away!

The specialist said that if he continues to progress as quickly as he has been, after his next 3 week checkup, he might get to turn in his helmet early!

Bottom line--Little Mister is responding exceedingly well to the molding helmet, and we are simply praying that he continues to respond as well over these next few weeks. With the crazy heat we've been having, getting rid of the helmet early would be a blessing in more ways than one! Plus, I've really started to miss "seeing" him without the helmet. That one hour each evening really shows me what I'm missing--he looks so much older, so much more mature without it. I feel like I'm missing him "growing up"--just a little bit--which is hard on this mama's heart.

A Shameless Plug

My sister-in-law, Rebecca, is amazing. She and her husband moved to Nashville a couple years ago so she could pursue her music career, and she's been doing just that. Her 5 song EP, "Just Getting Used to You" is out on iTunes, and if you haven't already downloaded it, go download it. Now.

Seriously, it's worth the $5. She is a creative and talented songwriter, and her voice is very unique. Her website describes her style as soulful acoustic pop, and that about sums it up.

If you like her stuff, please take a few minutes to write a review on iTunes. You might not know this, but recording studios check out that kind of feedback when considering signing an artist. Help her out, folks!